The Perfect Cabin

My Facebook feed has been filled recently with photos of rustic shelters, most of which are accompanied by text declaring them the perfect homes.

I beg to differ.

Having lived in some rather basic shacks and cabins over the years, I’ve found that the romantic notion of such accommodations quickly fades.

A dugout with a pole roof covered with moss doesn’t call to me.

My first home in Cooke City was an old cabin with low ceilings that was built into the mountainside. It was warm and cozy if the stove was going, but returning home from a trip to town typically involved building a fire in a cold stove. By mid-winter snow covered the windows, reaching at times to the eaves.

In order to keep the water from freezing I had to run a bleeder off the end of the plumbing. It sprayed a fine stream of water into the air next to the cabin, forming a mountain of ice that didn’t melt until late spring.

By contrast, however, my cabin was luxurious compared to others. I knew a few people at the time who were squatting in old mining cabins miles from town without any water or plumbing.

There was also a trio of young guys in their early twenties who lived in a small cabin down the road from me. They worked odd jobs around town and spent most of their time skiing. One of them packed supplies into hunting camps for a local outfitter, his arrival always preceded by loud music coming from the boom box he carried in his saddle bags. He claimed it kept him safe from bears.

They only lasted one winter, and I only recall visiting them once in their cabin. It was no more than 16x16 feet and I don’t remember it having any windows. It was hot from the wood stove, smelling of smoke, dogs and body odor, a funk that soon drove me out the door. The outhouse held more appeal.

This may be why small log cabins covered in snow don’t call to me. I’ve spent too much time in them. They’re usually too hot or too cold, drafty and dirty. They make nice pictures, and appeal to folks who don’t know any better, but they make for rough living.

Having been there and done that, I know better now. Give me a thermostat on the wall, and indoor plumbing. That’s the perfect home.

Parker Heinlein is at [email protected]