Heavy is The Head That Sits on This Neck

I have a problem. Ok, maybe not the biggest problem. But it is massive!

It’s my head. I do not know why the good Lord chose to give me such a massive noggin, but he did and it is a problem!

Don’t tell me that it is to hold a massive brain, because if I had a massive brain, I believe that I could use it to become a billionaire. I also think I would be able to remember a lot more things than I forget.

For years, I was convinced that I could not find a hat big enough for this dome. For those that haven’t seen me in person, I haven’t had a haircut since 2005, and I have a head full of dreadlocks.

Things changed for me recently when I used my brain to search the internet for an extremely large hat. I found that many with my condition lean towards the bucket hat.

The bucket hat has its time in history. I remember the Kangol bucket hat in the early 2000’s and how much I wanted one in high school.

Of course, I don’t like to shell out a ton of money for a name brand it. So, I found some generic hats on Amazon sized 2XL. (I definitely need a 3XL, but I made it work!)

After receiving the hat, I was amazed that a hat could fit this skull. I was on cloud nine and immediately received several compliments!

And then, my loving wife reminded me of the 2000s.

She said Britney Spears used to wear bucket hats. And since then, I have second guessed myself.

There are four Ps that I despise in life; pop stars, popular culture, politicians, and pineapples on pizza.

So my love for my newly found hat was challenged. That was until I found out about hat customization.

Between a former Malta mayor selling custom hats at vendor shows and a custom patch maker I met at a vendor show, that bucket hat is making a comeback, if only in my mind.

I was able to completely customize my hat with four patches; a Malta Mustang, a coffee themed patch, a camera patch, and an American flag/eagle patch.

That changed the whole complexity of the hat! My wife even seems to love it now!