Feel free to mind your business

Yesterday I heard a jackass bleat.

“Baaaahhh… Baaaahhhh.”

As I sat in my Jeep with Goose the News Hound riding shotgun, the line behind me started to grow and folks lined up for free COVID-19 virus testing at the Milk River Pavilion last Thursday morning. The Phillips County Health Department and Phillips County Hospital and Family Clinic teamed-up on the day to give anyone who wanted one a test for COVID-19, so I figured what the heck.

“Baaaahhh… Baaaahhhh.”

There it was again. I looked out my car window and a man I have never seen, met, or heard before was bleating like a sheep.

“You’re all a bunch of sheep,” he said as I looked at him.

“That a fact?” I quizzed.

“Why are you getting tested?” Sheep Boy asked.

“Because I want to see if I have deadly plague,” I said.

“You’re all getting tested because CNN told you to and you are all sheep,” he said and walked back into which ever reality he is living in and I imagine the reading material in his fantasy land is a 3rd or 4th grade comprehension level.

I do not care if people feel like I am following the flock because I wanted to get tested for COVID-19. These days, no one knows what or who to believe and that is alright, believe what you like. In my defense, I tend to rely on doctors and scientists for my medical information, but if you want to put your life in the hands of politicians trying to get reelected, your expert scientific skills gleaned from Google searches and YouTube videos, knock yourself out. But if I am a sheep for following scientists and doctors, then aren’t you too a sheep for following the advice of others just because it fits your tinfoil-hat narrative better? I would say so.

I do not say anything to people who don’t wear their seatbelts, don’t get flu shots, and don’t think the earth is round. Those are your monkeys and that is your circus. Wear a mask, don’t wear a mask; believe the COVID-19 has killed almost 150,000 Americans or don’t. It’s a free country, you are right to question things you don’t think are true, and if you die from this virus, I am sure your family will miss you. Selah and “sa·yo·na·ra.”

But what good does you calling me a sheep really do? It allowed you to puff out your chest a little bit and show me what a bad-ass you are? Maybe it is just not minding your own business to make yourself comfortable during what is an uncomfortable time? I don’t know. Whatever it is though, I don’t knock you when you eat paste, count with your fingers and toes, rip the wings off of flies or whatever else it is you do to get your jollies, so how about if you think people are sheep for doing something you think is silly, maybe just shut your soup cooler and mind your business.

Anyway, this is America. You have freedom of speech and I have freedom to think you are misinformed and four cans short of a six-pack. Be well, whomever you are, and be safe.